Exemplary

Your children imitate you. They do things based on what they observe. More often than not, you are their role model. Beware beware of bad habits.

I would prefer to brush Jack's teeth myself you know. But like all children emerging into independent individual, he wants to do it himself because he thinks he can. And I do oblige because he needs to learn.

I was brushing my teeth one night with jack next to me on a stool supposedly brushing his teeth too. I can see him looking at me. No no he was not just looking, he was watching. And he was imitating my brushing movement. Suddenly I found myself the need to brush correctly. Taking longer time at a spot. Doing the circle movement. Exaggerating at every stop. poking at the sides longer and looking like I am enjoying it. If he is going to learn, he'd better learn it the right way and not get corrupt in brushing teeth like I actually am. He copied this with such intensity.

And because I am trying my best to show him the correct way, I did with so much energy. Even more than my usual less than one minute teeth brushing. And with all the vigorous movement, I sometimes got my bangs into my eyes. I flipped my hair so that I can see better.

I saw Jack. he was doing that too. He flipped his hair. Hmm.

Let me do that again. Brush my teeth, and flip my hair.

And he brushed his teeth and he did it. He flipped his hair at the very same spot I flipped.

If in his future years, he brushes his teeth and flip his hair, that ladies and gentlemen is exemplary for you.

Moving Forward

Sometimes to move forward in life, you need to embrace it.

At certain point in one's life, we will become the person that people look to. As a role model. As an exemplary.

Say you are the first child. They say, get right with the first one, Insya Allah, the rest would be a breeze, if not better. The pressure the first child has to withhold. Not to mention, they have to look after adik-adik when they could be playing PS2 to their heart content.

A mother. A mother knows everything. What she does is the way of life. (That is until certain time. She will gain back her supremacy when she is really old thus truly truly wise)

A wife. Did you know that many times a husband likes or dislike on a person depends heavily on the wife's likes and dislikes? Woo your boss's wife if you must.

Then with Allah's will, you might found yourself not only playing a role as the first child but also sibling less. This is of course on top of your role as a sexy and goddessy wife and a soccer mum to your child. To boot with is a father who is wifeless.

What you do, how you react all are signs. A sacred, silent instruction for everyone to move. To act. To react. To accept.

I know some are happy to dispense advice. I do not want to hear cliche. I know what is right in the book. I dont want to hear what socially is right. It belittle me. You do not know what and how my life is. You think you know, but you do not. No one model fits all. Let me think for myself.

Responsibility is heavy. But it is ok once you learn to embrace.

So I am embracing. So some people can learn to accept. And some can open their heart.

And my dad can be happy. And there are more people to love.

Long Distance Thing

I had a little argument with lover the night before over YM. My lover, the macho man, sometimes refuse to understand me and like leaving me in a desperate needs to be consoled. Then we didn't get to chat the night after because he had a bowling game.

Last night, after a few nights of frustration, he was eager to talk to me. Especially after such a luring photo of Gunung Ledang waterfall. He also had been going out for a shopping spree over there. 50% discount on Mothercare. *Roll eyes* Obviously webcam is on demand to show what he bought and I would reciprocate by exhibiting me.

By 12a.m. malaysian time, he smsed me to get on with it. I, was, of course being the bitchier one wanted to punish him a bit more. Plus I was watching the cinderella thing movie played by Drew Barrymore. Romantic settings of 16th century, big gowns and all. I said I'll be there at 2a.m (Malaysian time)(I sleep very very late). He said he can't wait to talk to me. Actually me too me too. Who do I talk about the pictures I took if not with him. But I am an evil evil girlfriend. I said wait.

Ooohh I love that feel good movie. It suddenly made me feel like I want to tell him I am sorry and all. So really I cannot wait. I think I have punish him (me actually) enough.

So so so movie is finished. We got to chatting and webcaming. He showed all he bought. First it was Sya's dresses. Of course some are nice, one i jeered on. Then it started to rain.

I worry. I worry when it rains here. I would usually get disconnected. It was when he was showing Jack's lines of shirt that I finally get disconnected. Agggghhhh. I tried and tried. Switching off things. Shaking the wires. Nothing.

He smsed many times. I replied but apparently none of the messages were sent out. I ran out of prepaid! Huwaaaaaa! Not tonight.

We only got to preprepreforeplay. Of course it pissed me because he couldn't think of calling me lah kan. Hmmpphhh.

And today today I am going to KL. No internet. Huwaaaaa! For a week or so. By that time my pictures are obsolete. By that time really saying I am sorry will be slightly too late. Sure he can call. But YM is so so good for me. (he hates it though.) Worse by that time I would create another argument. My lover is very concise with words you see. And I talk too much! It makes me mad.

I miss him. I miss youlah baby.

Picnic at Gunung Ledang, Tangkak

Gunung Ledang used to be known as Mount Ophir.

I brought the kids there today to have a splashy cool fun day. I remembered when I was a kid, to have a picni at Gunung Ledang is really a big treat and a big thing. We didn't have a car back then. So usually when there were any rombongan or many of my dad's friend who asked us to join them, then we'd go. Going to Gunung Ledang would mean sleepless night the night before and my mum would cook her rolling eyes nasi lemak with sambal udang. I would have knots in the butterfly, too excited.

When I was a teenage I joined camping groups and camped there. I remembered going with a belia group. There were a few chinese guys from hulu mana entah who speak very little malay and some Indian girls pun dari estet mana who speak Malay quite well despite heavy accent. They were the best groups I have been with. Serious! I am not saying this afraid of my blog would be banned or something. We really learned a lot from one another. Every morning I would watch the Indian girl with her face washing routine that she claimed would keep acne away. She has clear skin. I think most of is turmeric powder. I don't know. It made her face yellow. She only eats and drink in her stainless steel plates and cups.

The chinese guys were chefs in some cruise boat. They cooked the best camping food I have ever had. I remembered they worked on some bamboos (was it?) and made us long chopstick for cooking.

I think I tried teaching them malay and sang dikir barat for our final show.

I have scaled Gunung Ledang only once all the way from Asahan to Sagil. One of the toughest mountains in Malaysia, I must say. Not that I have scaled many though. Just a few to tell tales. But I took this photo. Can you read it? ANyway it says it is the 64th highest in Malaysia and the sixth toughest mountain to climb. Too bad it didn't tell you the height of it. Google if you want.

Anyway, my kids had it easier. Now we can go to Gunung Ledang even at the spur of the moment like what we did today. The car journey which would take one hour and a half took us perhaps 40 minutes now that there are better roads, and I didn't have to cook nasi lemak. (I know OLAB did. he he). I bought KFC. (To Aliya, mesyet potete in Tangkak is quite good).

The legend about Gunung Ledang as probably some of you know is the Princess of Gunung Ledang who sometime go around as an old haggard, nenek kebayan. I heard so many stories about people meeting with them, either to face doom or to be granted with good things. When I was a young kid they told me not to use bad words here. Not to do any sinful things either...at that time it only meant no snogging. I heard countless stories of young couples dead, trees fall on their tent, lightning strikes. Basically do not tarnish this place. I don't know.

One time when I was scaling down, I met an old man. He looks so so, how shall I say it, like lights emitting from his face. There were many young men with him looking like pendekars. I remembered going down first but met them at the bottom. They got there earlier looking like they only had a 10 minutes walk, while I looked like my cheeks were drooping. They must know some very very short cuts.

Anyway, the kids had a great time. I didn't go up high though. One old man. One fidgety woman (me) three children...I think our spot was good enough. I remembered refusing to stop there when I was younger.

The water was great. Brrrrrrrrrr. The place still good. there are chalets now. People still litter.

We had a great time.

Pictures HERE

And Haziq became Nine

There is a lot about Haziq lately eh?

Anyway he became nine on the 14th July. The same day Gartblue turned older.

He is still the same boy in a way. Except with more knowledge than the previous year (perhaps?). Unlike me, he gets along with nearly everyone. He can speak both Malay and Enlish well. So in Qtar for instance, some kids only speak Malay and some kids only speak English and he can join any group, whereas the two groups rarely join each other. If you were drawing a venn diagram, he is the label where the two or maybe three curves lap. He avoids rougher boys though. He is not a toughie.

He is still an extrovert. With stories to tell and imagination to narrate.

Oh the other day we watched Harry Potter together. He said he liked the part when Harry was teaching his friends the spells. I said bravo. Teaching is a good way to learn more. it seems to leave an impact on him. We'll see.

Other than that he is a happy nine year old boy. Err I said man earlier eh? Heh heh

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Anyway I invited a few friends for Haziq's birthday the other day. It was more of a gathering with a few of my ex officemates who happen to have young kids like mine. So I cooked a bit and had little silly games with the kids.

here are some pics. CLICK HERE

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Other reads
HAZIQ IS SEVEN
HAZIQ IS EIGHT

7479

My brother told his fiance that his house number would be 7479.

That is my brother's grave's number.

Haziq is now a man!!

Not that you are not a man if you don't sunat (circumcise) though. (Disclaimer)

I think I should start up writing about the things that I did here so that I won't forget. Especially about Haziq sunat. So when he grows up, I can reread it to just so he remembers

I got Haziq sunatted the first week I got back. This is so hopefully we get him to heal quickly and we can do other things later. Initially I wanted to do it in KL. I changed my mind and decided to do it in Melaka instead for many reasons.

Saves our precious holiday time.
Lover get to be mummy's boy longer.
Haziq got to be granny's grandchild.
Eat! Eat! Eat!
Free rambutans.
So much space for kids to run about.

To top it, my mother-in-law (I shall refer to her as mak here from now on) was sooo happy. Terharu. Plus plus plus plus point for me.

Back to the sunat thing. Haziq did the clamp way. I think everyone is doing it now. Unless you prefer the conventional tok mudim style, sit on batang pisang kepit dengan buluh. It was relatively easy to jaga Haziq. Not much blood. Less pain (relative). Heals quite quickly. No need major pantang.

Just to report, Haziq cried when the doctor injected the anesthetics. Yazid held him tight and was comforting him I was worried lover would shout at him. I underestimate my lover sometimes.

Everyone watched the procedure, including JackJack who was beside the doctor. I admit I admit. I cried when i watched the doctor snip snip. And Sya saw I cried and kept asking me about it. Even Sya looked like she was going to cry. What more with Haziq grunting in pain. At one point Sya covered her face.

Alhamdullilah everything went smoothly. It healed as expected. On the day the efxers met up and celebrated mr. aie's birthday, it was Haziq's one week sunat. He has not healed well at that time and we had to wait for this prince to walk like a robot.

He was in pain each time he was not doing anything. He complained all the time. However, the pain seemed to disappear when he played PS2.

I think it's good lah that he sunat lambat. Hopefully the pain taught him to be more empathy with his wife in the future. He semi enjoyed the attention but really appreciate the monetaries he is receiving. Jack on the other hand is already circumcised. So no sebok-sebok around him in the future. Macam tak bestlah pulak.

In order to comfort Haziq, my lover told Haziq how his experience was worst. He had stitches. I told Haziq my friend's experience. He did conventional style. No anesthetics. No stitches. No laser. Togel aje. (he told me). I am not sure whether the approach to say that he is actually lucky, despite that he is in pain suppose to comfort him or agitate him even more.

In the future he would probably laugh at himself just like all of us laughed at men who suffered this little pain.

Oh some pictures here

Blogathon 2007

It is the time of the year again. I participated in a 24 hour round of blogging. All in the name of charity.

A few of us grouped together to blog for 24 hours. 24 hours I tell you. One entry for every half an hour. I am telling you it is not an easy feat to do that. Making sure entries are in every half an hour. Sometime ideas run out on you.

But we worked smart. Nusayba, our project manager, gathered a few of us to help the blogathon run smoothly.

Why are we doing this again? It is not an easy thing to do, putting in entry for each half an hour up to 24 hours. An each entry flourish with wonderful ideas. Great stories that I personally believe is worth the read.

If you like what we are doing. If you can appreciate our effort. I hope you can support us. Support us by pledging some amount of money to the charity body that we are all supporting.

This year's blogathon we are supporting Raudhatus Sakinah.

Raudhatus Sakinah (RS) a protection and guidance centre for young women, strives to help teenage girls who are in need of help. Operating since August 1998 under WanitaJIM, RS is a continuous project that exists to help the society tackle the social problems, specifically amongst teenage girls.

Make your pledge and directly donate to the charity Raudhatus Sakinah. Be generous, and let us help out those in need.

Read up the wonderful entries here BLOGATHON 2007.

And mine are heh heh

1. LOLLIES DOING BLOGATHON

2. NOMI, DIDI, CHEEKY and MOLLY

3. TRAGIC

4. Fateful Day

Other great contributors are Nusayba, NUTTY, ELISA, UGLYBUTADORABLE, DEW, AIE COMELNAZRAH, NONAH and INTYSSAR.

There is still time to support us. Thankyou to all of you luvelies.

I want to Cry

So I arm myself with "The Kite Runner book - Khaled Hosseini". (I know I know, the book is so basi to most of you already. I am a basi reader) The review says that this book will move even the hardest heart.

I rarely choose books that make me cry. In fact I usually avoid it. I sometimes think it is such a waste of emotion. You see I can't differentiate between fantasy and reality sometimes. That's why I call my self a goddess. However I do not mind inspiring stories, without reading motivational genres. So perhaps "The Kite Runner" will be a good pick. I need the cry.

My lover left for Qatar this morning.

Next summer trip I do not want this arrangement anymore. I will most likely go back to Malaysia early (two weeks the most. one month seems too long) and wait for him to come to me and we go back to Qatar together. I hate the feeling of being left behind.

Anyway after lover left, the kids ran all over the airport. They ran down the escalator. I tried to keep up, but it's my big fat arse you see. Then they ran up the travellator. Haziq then ran on the opposite direction travellator. Because he is a bigger boy and because he knows what he is doing, he ran at what seemingly so easy.

Zachary followed suit. But because he is smaller and does not know what he is doing, it wasn't an easy feat. In fact he couldn't do it. I saw him trying to run, but fell instead. He didn't understand that the travellator is going the opposite direction, like a treadmill. I saw him trying to get up with difficulty an finally he succumbed to the flow and cried all the way.

I was of course trying as fast as i can to run in my little stilettos when all these happen. I shouted at haziq but haziq ran off racing with Sya.

Jack cut his palms from the travellator's groove. Man, was i angry. A few minutes lover left, and a cut on Jack's hands.

He cried all the way to the car. And when all of us are in, Jack said he lost his slippers. Agghh, I ran back to look for it. After sometime, I found it terselit between the door and the car seat. Then I had to make sure I didn't exceed the allowed time to go out of the parking building. I didn't speed. I did not.

I am in Muar now. Plans are to do nothing and nothing at all for two weeks perhaps.

I am looking forward to my next adventures of nothingness.

Oh I am Here

Looking down through the small plane window, ahhh look at the green Malaysia. Such a contrast to the barren arab land. Just smell the air. Freshness! Eh! Wait! Is that haze that is clouding my eyes? Bleearrgghh.

And I must have forgotten how sticky it is here. I am drenched 24 hours. Jack looks like he is being dipped in the pool.

But it is so not hot here, despite everyone is complaining that it is. I was out in the mid afternoon and the heat is like 7 in the morning there. I must say, mid afternoon here is pleasant. ha ha ha.

I have manged to eat satay, otak-otak, mee goreng. koay teow goreng basah, abc, ikan bakar at umbai. And durian, durian, durian. Banguun durian tidur durian. Sampai boleh memilihlah. Kalau tak kucing tidur tak mau. No KFC just yet but I ate A&W with root beer float. Nonah, I was thinking of you.

I'll be going to Melaka next week so I guess I won't be on the net for a long time. Even in KL. Perhaps I should leave my number here. I don't have most of your numbers. So if you have any problem whatsoever, do hesitate to call at +60196570808. Especially famygirl and zan. I need to know your plan.

Hmm what else..oh ok. I have joined the group of most modern parents I know by succumbing myself to get PS2 for my son. Yeah I know, it's not the best move. Insya Allah I will place discipline on him. Not on schooldays for sure. I think I should allow some indulgence of modern stuff on him. He does seem to be rather lost around his friends. I am not afraid to practice my veto power on him anytime. No anti socialising is allowed. We'll see.

Oh by the way, I think being 9 is probably not the best age for a boy. He can't play at certain parks. He is not allowed to enjoy the car ride at Umbai. He needs to look after his brother. He is too young to join the teenagers but getting old to act silly.

Oh oh. You know we were eating together at this restaurant here, noisily. I was looking at this family. The wife quiet blank stare. Husband quiet blank stare. Two kids were also quiet. Food came, mom feeds kids. Father eats quietly. Such table manners. BORING! Most of the time hubby reads papers. We do that too when we are eating without the kids, but we usually share our opinions on topics and soemtimes berebut papers.

I thank God for all of us speak and talk to each other at the dinner table. While waiting for food we can play games or listen to their stories. Or I would talk to lover while the kids quarel. I use to think memekaknya, but now I am thankful because I don't think I can stand if they do not speak to each other.

Other than that, there is nothing to report. The kids are having fun. So far so good. I am definitely not counting days to go back to Qatar.