Sunday, November 08, 2009

The Calling

My lover used to say many years ago, "I want to go to hajj before I am 40". And I used to answer, "Err before you 40 that would make me go before 37 years old. I am too young lah."

But time passed. Things change. Something happen. Skin sagged. Hips widened.

So, it was last year I decided to go to this hajj talk. The talk was meant for the last years' bakal hajj. At that time I have already felt the need to fulfill the fifth pillar.

So the speaker started off by asking the participant the meaning of talbiyah. I didn't know what the talbiyah means actually. I can recite them because it is always repeated on TV. I can recall it from my childhood memories. Anyway I think in the end someone read from the book, but the speaker reiterated it.

Aku menyahut panggilan-Mu ya Allah. Aku menyahut panggilan-Mu ya Allah dan tiada sekutu apapun bagi-Mu. Sesungguhnya puji, nikmat dan kekuasaan hanya bagi-Mu tanpa sekutu apapun bagi-Mu dan juga segala kekuasaan adalah milik Mu. Ya Allah aku menyahut panggilan-Mu. Tiada sekutu bagi Mu.

Here I am responding to You, O Allah, Here I am responding to You. Here I am, You have no partner, here I am responding to you. Verily all praise and blessings are Yours, and all sovereignty, You have no partner.


He got me at "menyahut panggilan Mu." I don't know how to tell you how I felt, but when I heard what it meant, I felt ashamed of my ignorance. I am ashamed that I have ignored God for the most part of my life. I felt small. But on the other hand I felt hope because I know that I can still respond to Him. I cried passionately that day, until someone passed me a tissue. :P. But because of that, I made a resolution that I want to go as soon as I can. Alhamdulillah. All praises goes to Allah for all the bounties that He has bestowed.

I wonder if lover remembers what he said about making hajj by 40. He is after all born in the year 69. Pray for us.

9 comments:

numejo said...

I have to say, this is the almost the same as my experience when I first heard about the meaning of the talbiyah. Lebih2 lagi bila ustazah yang bagi ceramah tu, menegaskan dengan penuh semangat dan emosi, "kita tak nak ke sambut panggilan Allah dengan puji2an bagiNya?" etc2.

(oh menangis kat office la pula)

Anonymous said...

aku ketinggalan bas!! patutla komen kat FB cenggitu.

You're going you're going! yay yay! alhamdulillah syukur! I'm so happy for you! Minta2 lah our turn will come soon, insya allah.

yay! yay! lolls pi haji!

an0nymous-ign0ranus said...

oh friggin' hell. this post brings tears to my eyes.

Anonymous said...

alhamdullilah! baru dapat confirm as i read this. susah ahhh takde pc ya.

but! hope you have a good and smooth pilgrimage.

-nonah-

Mrs.A said...

Lollies,

Semoga dipermudahkan dan semoga Allah terima ibadah you sepenuhnya.

masdiana said...

fi amanIllah my friend... go accept His call in the best of iman + health insyaAllah, + may you return with a 'clean' sheet insyaAllah, for hajj erases all (sins) that is before it, + the only reward for an accepted hajj is Jannah.

elisataufik said...

I remember feeling so sebak when I recited "Here I am".
May your hajj (which has already started, actually) be a spiritually fruitful one.

azGROWLen said...

mmmmmmmm when r u leaving. me family and me pray for ur safe journey and haj mabruk

Lollies said...

PB - rasa macam masa tu jugak nak lari pergi.

rotidua - hahahahha. aku rasa inilah komen yang paling lawak pasal aku dapat pergi hajj.

babe - oh hugs babe. Hugs kuat-kuat.

nonah - Pray for me ya?

mrs A - Ameen. :)

diana - Ameen. Ameen. Ameen. Bergetar part yang only accepted hajj tu. May Allah make it easy for me. May Allah make it easy for me.

elisa - when we understand the meaning, it just pierces the heart kan?

azen - thank you azen. I will not forget you and your family insya Allah.

la ilahha ila anta. Subhanaka ini kuntumm minaz zolimin.