Thursday, August 18, 2011

Raising Boys (Children) to Love the Masjid

The Prophet said:

There are seven whom Allah ill shade in His Shade on the Day when there is no shade except His Shade:
a just ruler;
a youth who grew up in the worship of Allah, the Mighty and Majestic;
a man whose heart is attached to the mosques;
two men who love each other for Allah's sake,
meeting for that and parting upon that;
a man who is called by a woman of beauty and position [for illegal intercourse], but be says: 'I fear Allah',
a man who gives in charity and hides it, such that his left hand does not know what his right hand gives in charity;
and a man who remembered Allah in private and so his eyes shed tears.'

Narrated by Abu Hurairah & collected in Sahih al-Bukhari (english trans.) vol.1, p.356, no.629 & Sahih Muslim english trans.) vol.2, p.493, no.2248

Alhamdulillah when I began to learn about the religion that I am born into, I had an easier time accepting it perhaps due to the environment I was placed in. for that I thank Allah highly for opportunity seized is a blessing.

Going to the masjid has been an easy(ier) experience for the men and we have been encouraging the boys to do the same. Jack has been frquenting the mosque for most Fardh prayers ever since he is five Alhamdulillah. May all of them remain steadfast.

The masjid's norm here is very chidren friendly in a sense that a small child is treated equally as an adult in a praying saff in the masjid. Just as the sunnah deemed it to be, that is the right of the saff (front row) is for those who come early.

The locals, even though their young ones do not frequent the masjid as much, in fact very very very few, love children in the masjid. To the extent most of the older locals would really go all the way to either pat Jack's head or kiss his hand. Many would give a small amount of money too.

When we stayed at our last house, where there were more locals, the boys would get their duit raya from these atuks. Minimum QR50 you.

Mind you, Jack was very fidgety in his prayers. He can never stay still. He would look around, play in his solah. Bite his nails. Pick his nose. Look at people. Sometimes falling himself down when making ruku'. Making sujud earlier than the imam. After that running havoc in the masjid.

A friend I know, who had even more hyper children, got angry with his young sons for making too much noise, was called by the imam. The imam advised my friend to play it soft with his kids and to never give up bringing them to the masjid.

Another friend who shouted at his son for dozing off in his prayer got told off by the imam.

Sure, they would tell the kids to be quiet also. But they do not discourage the boys to come and never pull any of them out of the saff. In fact, the kids are better off to pray next to their dad.

Naturally, I am a bit apprehensive to come back to Malaysia because of this. I am slightly not comfortable with the idea that they would ask my boys to get out of their saff and go to the back. I understand this is what is practised in malaysia.

Good read by Dr. Asri

However, as not to cause tension and rifts, I have talked to te children about this and told them to comply to the situation until people are more aware of everyone's rights.

Our first taraweekh in Malaysia was at a smaller surau in Melaka. The first few days were ok. None of the jemaah told Jack to leave the saff. In fact they gave way to Jack to solat at the side in case he needs to doze off during the taraweekh. Yes dia selalu tidur. LOL. However on one of the nights, a different imam came in. The big honcho imam kampung number one (who is not a tahfiz. On most taraweekh night they all upah some young tahfiz from Siam to lead the taraweekh.) He actually held Haziq's shoulder (Ahhh? Haziq also included as the young one ah?) and asked nicely (Alhamdulillah) for him and Jack to go to the back.

Some of the jamaah whispered to lover, "maaflah dia ni tak faham sangat agaknya." Referring to imam honco number one.

However, according to lover, they couldn't go to the most back apparently becase none of the older people want to leave their "right" to be at the back! Pulak! So Haziq and Jack went to the second saff instead.

Reported by Abu Hurayra: Allah's Messenger said: "The best rows for men are the first rows and the worst, the last rows; and the best rows for women are the last rows and the worst, the first." (Muslim #881)

What is meant by best and worst is in terms of reward.

So that was quite funny.

For the fardh prayer, when usually there is only one saff no one tells Jack (or haziq) to go to the back. In fact the pakcik-pakcik were delighted to see Jack in Fajr prayer. Alhamdulillah. That was really really nice.

May Allah bless them and make all of understand the deen.

Yesterday we prayed taraweekh at the main masjid in Muo. None of my boys were told off. So yayy!

Having said all of these, I must say I understand where this come from. Most people only bring their kids for the once a year praying galore - taraweekh - and expect their kids to behave. How can they behave all the way from tahyatul masjid - four rakaah isya - two rakaah sunnah - 8 rakaah taraweekh with long surahs and three rakaah witr with long qunut. Not including the dzikir that they read out loud in betweent the prayers (cuma di mlaysia sahaja)?

How can they behave as you want them to when they have never frquented the masjid for shorter but obligatory prayers? How can we expect people to be compassionate about the noisy kids as well?

Even in Qtar, people would tell off the kids who make continuous noise in the taraweekh!

Come every fasting month , I hear the stories of peopele saying the masjid are not friendly with kids. It must be noted also, that many of the kids including adults are not friendly to the masjid for 11 months of the year.

I read a comment about how terrible a masjid is. Don't they know that her son has prayed in front of kaabah before. Masya Allah for her and her kids. Maybe, her kids are very well behaved. Unfortunately not the case of many children though.

I think perhaps many of us (the men) should frequent the masjid with their boys more throughout the year when it is in fact an obligatory to pray at the masjid. Then perhaps this issue will be revisited in a different light.

Alhamdulillah, I was made to understand that some communities have been proactive on this as well. Their masjids are very people friendly and so many attractive activities for the jamaah.Barakallahu fikum

I actually see a very good light oncoming to us. These are the things that makes you feel that there is hope for the next generation.


verignac said...

I like!! sambil carik button "LIKE" :D

Anonymous said...

Lollies, elaborate sikit pasal the "hadith the best for women are the last rows and the worst, the first" - even in a special room full of women ke? Or applying to a mix hall? Thanks. *Shidah*

Lollies said...

Fasha - kena tempel like button

shidah - at the time of prophet saw, the masjid praying area is small. So for woman sapa datang dulu the best place is solat at the back. The most front would be too near to the men. Walaupun ada tirai

kalau setakat bayan and many masjids in qatar tu insya Allah no issue.

Allah knows best

butterflutter said...

Alhamdulillah since he was 4yo whenever pergi surau/masjid Afiq never solat in other saf except sebelah ayah.
It's all about adab. When i bring the girls (I kan ada 2 yg suka berborak) on the way dlm kereta kena keep reminding them the reason kita pergi surau/masjid. I have not bring them for teraweekh yet.