Sunday, September 28, 2008

Raise your hand

I have told you earlier about how Mrs Fath can come up with some words that somehow would trigger some neurons in my puny brain. Today I feel very moved to tell you what she said quite sometime ago.

It was during a morning coffee at one of the lady's house, Mrs Fath told us about her experience going for a jemaah prayer in one of the mosques here. After praying, she performed the nawafil prayers, doing dzikir and made du'a as usual (based on what I usually see her do). And after she completed the routine, an arab lady approached her.

The arab lady said why do you make du'a like that. Then she proceeded to explain that when one makes du'a, one should really raise their hands. Raise your hands like as if you are begging. Beg like a slave to your Lord. After all that is what we are, slaves to Allah. Not cup it to your mouth. Where is the determination?

After Mrs Fath told us this story, the other ladies started talking about how one should make a du'a. Which hand gesture is the best.And they broke into laughter at various ways people put up their hands. Also that some people say that we really should put our hands together and cup it so that Allah's mercy would not escape, like as if we are catching the mercy.

Mrs Fath did not realise that what she said affected me alot. It really dawned one me that we are truly the servants of Allah. I mean i know we are hamba Allah, but somehow the word hamba Allah has become a cliche. It's an overused word. I know I am a hamba Allah, but it doesn't mean anything. It just meant that I am just another creation.

What I had been all these while is really an arrogant slave. One who thinks that when she makes du'a, it will always be fulfilled. After all, benda ni biasalah, habis sembahyang aje doa. Hari-hari pun benda yang sama. dah hafal macam routine. Sesekali ada tambah benda baru sikit yang special nak diminta.

Tak terfikir pun, adakah layak doa aku ini di makbulkan.

And when I put up my hand like a slave and beg for his mercy and beg for his blessings, then only I can feel how small I am. Unworthy of anything from Allah.

I worry. Oh no! I feel so lost. I beg. I pray. O! Allah! You are most forgiving O Allah, You love forgiving O Allah, Forgive me O Allah. *.

And I repeat them numerous time.

I feel that I do not deserve any of Allah's attention nor mercy.

None at all.

But I am holding on that Allah's is merciful. And that he Accepts repentance. He is most Loving.

O Allah! You are most merciful o Allah. I beg you for forgiveness. I feel that I do not deserve your mercy but I am afraid. O Allah grant me your mercy O Allah ...

And the word Hamba Allah has a totally different light after that.

*One of the best du’aa’s that may be recited on Laylat al-Qadr is that which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) taught to ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her). Al-Tirmidhi narrated, and classed the report as saheeh, that ‘Aa’ishah said: “I said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, if I know which night is Laylat al-Qadr, what should I say on that night?’ He said, ‘Say: Allaahumma innaka ‘afuwwun tuhibb al-‘afwa fa’affu ‘anni (O Allaah, You are forgiving and You love forgiveness, so forgive me).”


Ummu Layth said...

eh what a coincidence.
i used to doa macam cupping the hands near the chin jugak. then i went to Umm Bilal's class and dia kata doa angkat tangan tinggi (begging) with your head down (humble)..itu baru betul.

i tried it and it makes so much difference. terasa betul mcm hamba, alhamdulillah..just a simple act aje make us realise this

nusayba said...

Thanks for the lovely reminder. Shattering, but lovely nonetheless. Hope you and your family are well. Take care.

Lollies said...

aliya - wei thank you for the extra knowledge. angkat tangan and head down for humbleness. memang terasa lainnya. rasa bila bercakap tu, terketar2 aje and unworthy.

nusayba - semua sihat and relaxing. its a school holiday. pity lover is still working.

Anonymous said...

as usual, thanks for such entries, educational for us whom reads, points to ponder as well. a new point to observe as well in the future :)


shidah said...

yes doa kena datang dari hati yang ikhlas dan meaningful serta penuh kehambaan. It is very difficult to achieved that being an arrogant slave as we are. When imaam recite dua in witir, most of the ladies cried. i wonder what it is all about. Lucky they all dapat menghayatinya.