Fourth Year

Today, the 12th December 2009, is our fourth year here residing in Doha. Alhamdulillah. Yes time flew fast. And even though many times, I do not know where my time went, but I think it has been quite a full four years of my life.

I looked back at those times, because I kept some memories in the blog. The building up towards 12th december 2005. I do feel the sadness of leaving and I still understand why I was sad the way I was.

Even though there were not many posts in December 2005, mainly because I did not have the computer nor the internet, I still remembered the emotional time of my first few months staying here.

It was relatively hard because we did not have a car back then and public transports sucks. But Mr Drive Fast and Ms Fashion designer helped us alot. And we are thankful for that. But many times we find ourselves waiting for the cab with loads of plastic bags in the cold.

But it was a nice adventure for the family.

I also remembered because of the time difference between Malaysia and Doha, which is 5 hours difference, my children would be pooped out by 7p.m. which is essentially 12 midnight in Malaysia. Thus they were always sleeping in the shopping trolley because we had to shop for basic essentials. And we can only do it when lover come back home after work.

But the kids were ok about it.

And despite the "adventure", we can talk about it and smile. And secretly I am relieve that my children go through some tough time. It sort of builds one's character. Thinking back, it was too little to complain.

And also because we took the cab so much, I know some part of the road and could actually assist some newbies taxi drivers.

My first few months was filled perhaps with sadness, anger, boredom and yet thrill of a new possible adventure in this new country.And most of all, despite the argument, I am thankful that we the whole family are together. And because I am a very independent person thus an independent mum, wife and woman, I need to have my husband with me. I know myself too well...

Even though not all are spelt in the blog, but I can still remember them. All kind o emotions were building up towards my mum admittance to the ICU which was followed by her death. May Allah forgive her. May Allah elevate her status. And may we all be reunited in Jannah.

It was perhaps a big turn after her death for me.

Why do I need to put up an entry of my fourth year. Well it is because I should be packing back to Malaysia and looking forward to my career or whatever that is left of what I had.

My lover's contract is done. However, he is renewing it Insya Allah. It is still not signed yet and no hard pressed discussion has been made. But going back is not the highest priority of choice at this moment.

As for me, if I cried buckets that we had to move to Qtar, I will cry even berkolah-kolah air mata if we had to leave now.

If in my first year, I had trouble connecting with people, now Allah has send me many friends whom I love for the sake of Allah. I like to keep myself busy and Alhamdulillah Allah has allowed me to be busy. And I love the sebok-sebokkan diri. May Allah put barakah in my time.

Understandably, this is not the country that I want to reside forever. Thus I pray to Allah, if He wills us not to stay here, to take us to a land where my family can preserve their deen and that there will be goodness for us there.

I think I was also 5 kilos lighter.