Monday, April 11, 2005

Pep Talk

The day has finally come. The day that I have been waiting for since last November. I can’t point my finger whether I really am looking forward to this day. It is quite a mixed feeling really.

You see, I applied for a helper last November. A helper in Malaysian context is a live-in maid. And in my case I applied for an Indonesian helper. I have been living and sustaining on my own (of course with great help from my lover) without a helper to help me out for eight years. But now that Haziq is schooling and there is no decent nursery near my house, I think it’s about time. As much as I am reluctant to have one.

Really, it’s quite difficult to have somebody else in the house. A stranger at that. Someone that you have to put trust mending your house when you are not around and worst of all mending your children. Particularly my 10-month old Zachary. She came last Saturday. Until today, I still find it difficult to pass Zachary to her.

Today I took Yati, my helper, to Mama Ina’s house. Mama Ina is the one who has been minding Batrisyia and Zachary all this while. She will train her on the dos and the don’ts with the kids. How to bottle-feed Zachary for I am utterly clueless about bottles myself. There are no bottles in the house at all.

The first day she came, that night, I gave some pep talk. I told her,

Please have your motives (nawaitu) right by coming over here. You are here to look for money, to provide income for your family that you’ve left in Indonesia. You are here to work at my house, please honour what you’ve promised.

You may have heard cases of maids being abuse back at your home country. But you also must realise that I have heard worst cases here about Indonesian maids. Child abuse and kidnap, stealing (not to mention husbands too – I didn’t mention this), running away with boyfriends, bringing strangers in the house, feeding children meager food while they chat away with their friends. The list is endless.

So I want you to be sincere. Please respect my family, for I will, too in return. I plan to treat you well here and I hope you can appreciate that. You have children of your own too…

The most important things are my children. Please place my children as your priority too. You may not hit them. At any instances they are rude and are overboard, you can tell them no and shall report it to me. I will be the one responsible.

Finally, I welcome you to my house and I hope you can work well with my family.

With that I end my pep talk, not before giving her a list of routine work to do as well.

Pray for me that this deal will go well.

Pray for my family too.


atiza said...

just watch out for danger signs..mind you there might be none. don;t let her mix with her lot that much. normally its the friends that influenced them.

but, somehow, how good you are in treating them, there's bound to be one or two bad apples...hope yours is not.

Anonymous said...

i observed the way my uncle treated her bibik.. which is good.. don't ever trust her dat much.. esp.. locked ur room when ure out working.. and put all ure valuables in ther.. say.. after more years.. maybe 5 or 10.. u can loosen it up a lil bit.. and u don't have to explain ur doings.. just treat the bibik consistently.. the way u are.. the phone policy is also importante.. ure home address shud me disclosed for her malaysian based colleague unless for letters from indon.. gud luck sis and thing shud be just fine for u i think..

Lollies said...

atiza- I hope so too..

wan - I'll bear that in mind.

Knot in tummy

Anonymous said...

I think you'll do okay. Not to worry too much and the most important thing is to keep an open mind. you two need each other. All the best. I skipped the sit down pep talk thingy this round. When she's slacking I shall have one

Ni said...

ada maid pun problem, tak dak maid pun problem gak

Lollies said...

lyn - I plan to have a weekly pep talk for a month or so.

Cik Ni - betul, betul

shidah said...

plese go through her things to ensure no funny items brought to your house. funny items such as alat2 sihir, minyak tanh kubur, paper with alien remarks etc - my mom experienced this before. the rest, berserah pada allah, inshaallah & best of luck!

Anonymous said...

hmm Shidah..God I have never done this. You's kind of private stuff..camana nak buat yek. with her presence or without? Maybe I should surprise her huh?

shidah said...

lollies: kalau nak check of course when she is around and tell her the reason why as well... if she has good intention- she will understand - trust has to be built, kan?

Anonymous said...

Thanks Shidah..I plan to do that next round of my pep talk

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