Sunday, April 29, 2007

Al Fatehah

I was in pain yesterday. Unproductive cough and feeling feverish. My head was throbbing and I felt cold. Everything was cold despite the temperature showed 34C.

The children were their boisterous self. In fact so boisterous, Haziq broke one of my picture frames. I just couldn't bring myself to yell at him. Or probably I did. I told him to go to sleep.

I asked lover if I am feeling bad tomorrow can you send the kids to school. He was more concerned that Haziq and him would be late. I sadly retorted that I am in the worst position in my life and cannot afford to be sick, At least I could get an mc if i were working. Despite the throbbing head, I couldn't sleep. Or was it because of the throbbing head, it was hard for me to sleep.

Then morbid thoughts, which usually come now and then when I am feeling down got me. I thought of my own death. The imagination was very detail that I cried. I truly cried to my sleep.

I needed that cry I suppose.

I woke up feeling better at my usual time. Prepared the kids breakfast and no one asked whether I can send the kids to school. I am sending them by the way, thank you.

Then I got a call. Apparently there were numerous missed calls and a message. It was 530 in the morning and there was no number on the screen.

My one and only sibling passed away yesterday. Exactly one year and one month after my mum. He was only 32. Al Fatehah.

Now there is only me and my dad. I am feeling really sad now.

18 comments:

superunknown said...

al fatihah to his soul.

takziah mummy. arwah being only 32, i feel that u wasn't expecting this sad news. i hope everything turn up fine for u.

k.d said...

Alah Lollies...I'm so sorry for your loss...

To lose one's brother at such a young age...heartbreaking...

Masya-Allah....takziah dear...

*big hugs*

silversarina said...

Al Fatihah and salam takziah dari akak, sabar dan redha dengan ketentuan Ilahi, INsyaAllah sama-sama kita doakan semuga rohnya ditempatkan bersama roh orang-orang beriman, Amin.

Take care !!

Ir. Hanafi Ali said...

Kematian amat menginsafkan. Moga ALLAH selamatkan mereka yang telah pergi dan kita yang masih tinggal, tinggallah berjuang sepanjang zaman.

Saya tahu awak tabah.

anggerik merah said...

Innalillah.

Lollies dear, salam takziah to you and family. It is a very sad news. That is also make you a stronger person day by day to face this life.

Big HUGGGG...

No Angel said...

Al fatihah.

*extra big hug for my fav hot mama*

Sunfloraa said...

Al Fatihah

Salam takziah to you and your family. May you be a tower of strength during these trying moments.

Take care.

Kak Elle said...

al-fatehah untuk arwah and salam takziah to you and family.At 32 he was too young but he is in good hand.Was he sick?

Akuro ® said...

Innalillahi wainna ilaihirooji'un.. Take care there..

1na said...

Al-Fatihah dihadiahkan kepada arwah.

Tabahkan hati, kuatkan semangat.

Saya kelu lidah nak berkata apa2.

Takziah kak lollies... (hugs)

NJ@Goboklama said...

Innalillahhiwainnailaihirojiun...takziah untukmu,Al-Fatihah untuk arwah...be strong

Anonymous said...

Lollies, my deepest ta'ziah..tak terucap dengan kata2..
dah lama tak jenguk your blog..alih2 dapat berita camni...

i'm in cairo now..for the past one month..don't know how long i'll be here. on unpaid leave as MIL is critically ill.

long story..we'll talk when i see you online, ok?

take care, love


NEF

UglyButAdorable said...

lollies...

innalillah..i dunno wht to say...i lost a brother too not so long ago...sudden death...i completely understanding you..

semoga roh arwah dicucuri rahmat...

Jo Kontan said...

Take care...

Anonymous said...

innalillahhh...banyak2 bersabar yee...

lion3ss said...

Lollies dear - takziah...semoga dia ditempatkan di kalangan yang beriman.

Alfatihah...

Mama Rock said...

oh lollies, I was so behind in my reading. sorry to hear about your loss. be strong ya. semoga roh arwahnya diletakkan dalam golongan orang2 yang beriman...Al-fatehah!

Anonymous said...

Dear Rozie,
I only knew it yesterday from Shaari, he came over to KK for training, and told me about it, I was surprised to hear that, because none in KL told me yet. Innalillah, and Alfatihah for him. Mamat, Kota Keriangan.